well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize
