I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
