the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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