Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Randomize
