I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
