it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
