I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
