I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
