I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
