I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
