im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
you made out with another girl for some wings
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
