She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
