I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize