Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
this just has baby written all over it
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
