I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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