is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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