new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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