Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
is wine microwaveable?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
