She announced her abortion via fbk
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
