I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
