a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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