I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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