Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize