ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You made out with two different species that night
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
