My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
