i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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