Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Randomize
