He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I just want to make out with him forever
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
