he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
