I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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