Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
