btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
