Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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