he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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