How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
