ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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