Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Do you still have your period?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
