Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
