She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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