He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I fill condoms, not promises.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
