why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
4 words: hood of his car
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
