I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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