ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
