Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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