I want to make a zoo with you.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
