look no pants
Welp...herpes.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
