well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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