she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
