I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize
