your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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