try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize